On Making Friends

So I've talked about my awkwardness with the younger generations. Lets talk about my awkward with people my age.

There's a reason that I have so many experiences with creeps, geeks, and the deranged. I'm a little bit of all of the above.

Since moving three years ago to a new town and a new job I've made exactly zero friends. The friends I tried to make (all two of them) were either grumpy and old or fired from work. There's a light at the end of this tunnel though. A couple of weeks ago I met a new girl at work. We started talking, she was funny, smart and had a lower lip piercing - my kind of chick, in a totally hetero way (oh who am I kidding, we're all a little bit gay, just like we're all a little bit racist).

Anyway, stepping away from the potentially offensive (told you I was awkward), this girl and I were talking, lets call her Aubry, and I was getting super excited at the prospect of a new friend. At one point I actually blurted out, "ohmigosh! We could totally be besties!"

Yeah, I then had to work on recovery. I went on to say that I'm not as creepy and weird as I seem and I get better with time.

Hopefully she'll take me up on my offer to hang out once she gets moved up here. Although on thinking about it, I probably said something like, "once you move up here let me know where you live so I can sit outside your house and watch you through binoculars" instead of "we should catch a movie sometime."

Oh well, I've still got CG. I've managed to somehow hypnotize him into staying with me. Sometimes I wonder why he's managed to stick around, then I remember he's a little bit creepy, geeky, and deranged too. We're meant for each other in a totally creepy way.

Correlation does not imply causation

It just doesn't, so please stop using it in arguments.

Thanks.

Who ARE You?

I was chatting (and by chatting I mean typing) with some friends a bit ago and the subject of personality tests came up, specifically the Myers-Briggs test. It seemed that most people who have taken the test agree with it. Not just my online besties, but also most of my co-workers.

I guess a few years ago the Company had them all take these tests to expand their minds or some other weird corporate brainwashing thing. Anyway, most of them still remember the tests and what their results wound out being.

It's kinda cool, I ended up being an ISFJ.

If you want to take the test yourself: Humanmetrics.

I suppose that's all for now.

Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving.

Free Food

There are few perks in being a corporate drone. These are: steady paycheck, health benefits, the occasional free meal.

Today I have gotten lots of free food: tomatoes, peaches, a watermelon, and a free lunch.

Some days are kind of completely amazing. The peaches are genuine Calhoun peaches, the most delicious things ever. The tomatoes and watermelon are home grown from a co-worker.

We also got our shirts in today for all of the events we will be doing over the next month or so. They look amazing and I'll be taking one home with me tonight to wear this weekend.

I heart free stuff.

Office Contests

I won an office contest last week. Everyone turned in pictures of themselves from 1984. Then these pictures were circulated and we had to guess who was who.

I was born in 1985 so I felt left out. I offered to give them a picture of a spermatozoa but the contest coordinator felt that the picture would be inappropriate.

They did let me make guesses though and I have to say I totally kicked ass. There were only five people who got them all right. They drew names for the prizes and I got a Rubik cube.

I hate Rubik cubes. I've never even come close to completing one and I've never had any desire to really try. I did, however, decide to display it on my desk space with pride.

Someone has been messing with my Rubik cube.

They keep mixing the colors! The colors need to match.

I don't even want to imagine the carnage that will await me when I get back from vacation next Monday. Blue, green, white, yellow, red, orange, mixed together all willy-nilly.



What if they start messing with Louie the Lightning Bug! Oh the humanity! These people obviously have no moral compass.